Maybe not, but it's the same way you spell pathetic:
When the governor was ready to sign this year's "education" budget, he created a "school students as hostages" photo-op similar to last year's. Back then when he cut $1.3 billion worth of education funding out from under school students he also forced some of them to witness his signing off on those cuts with a custom made red Sharpie with his name on it, then gave some more to the kids as souvenirs.
This year, while throwing them a bone by giving back a fraction of those cuts while acting as if it was his personal gift, he went with custom made blue Sharpies with his name on them, and gave them out as souvenirs.
Who needs a diploma, am I right kids?
Well, that was only the beginning. Here's an account of this year's awkward moment of Rick Scott budget-theater from Steve Bousquet of the Tampa Bay Times:
The governor's staff selected Cunningham Creek Elementary in the village of Fruit Cove, a place of neatly manicured upper-middle-class subdivisions with idyllic names like Ivy Lakes and Julington Creek.
The setting could have been a Disney movie, but it was real.
What transpired was surreal to watch.
Any school is honored to get a visit from the governor. The Cunningham staff rounded up kindergarten teacher Virginia Leopold and a couple of dozen kids from kindergarten through second grade, who sat on the floor, staring up at the governor.
More stagecraft: Scott's advance people had placed a blackboard behind him featuring the $1 billion theme, and a bowl of apples was on the desk where the budget awaited his signature.
But Scott didn't deliver a home-run sound-bite in that setting, so the photo-op was largely wasted. Scott handled himself well in a subsequent session with reporters, which his staff insisted be done outdoors, "right in front of the flagpole," as an aide instructed.
In the school, the kids were seated on the floor, so Scott had to look down at them.
Scott: "How's school?"
Kids (in unison): "Good."
Scott: "Ever had a governor come to your class before?"
Kids: "Nooooo …"
Scott: "You have tests this week?"
Kids: "Nooooo …"
While Scott chose a day for a disruptive photo-op during FCAT testing (though the article claims Scott chose a less disruptive time of day), his staff didn't bother to do their homework and point out to Scott that children that age don't take the FCAT.
Then there was Scott's sad attempt at teaching the children a little something about government. Yes, what better lesson to teach children about in kindergarten through second grade, some who, until that day didn't even know what a Governor was, than the subject of.....auto insurance fraud?
Then the governor decided he would explain to the children the importance of reducing fraud in Florida's no-fault car insurance program.
"There's money that's wasted in auto accident mistakes. Fraud," Scott told the kids. "So we passed a bill — personal injury protection — that hopefully will reduce the growth rate and the cost of auto accident fraud."
Then Scott turned his attention to a series of oversized cartoon-style posters that explained how a bill becomes law.
"There's amendments, and people try to tack on amendments to change the bill," Scott told the kids.
Well, here's a lesson those children will unfortunately be able to relate to in the near future, one that Scott neglected to share. It's a simple math problem:
If Governor Scott subtracted $1.3 billion from education in the state budget in 2011, but added $1 billion for education in the state budget in 2012, how much would you have for education after he signed that budget?
That would be LESS FUNDING.
Here's another lesson kids. Hope your parents can afford to send you out of state for college, because that will probably cost them less than a college education here in Florida. Also probably a better quality education at that. You see, Scott didn't stop cutting when he finished with K-12. He not only cut money along with entire curriculums from our universities, but they're going to have to make up for it by hiking tuition!
But wait, there's more! He also succumbed to a retiring legislator by creating an entirely new college just for him after he cut off funding for an already existing one when he didn't get his way sooner! That's going to cost students, but it looks like some instructors there will be losing their jobs too.
Oh, and by the way kids, here's some bonus information. Many of those legislators who have been doing their level best to cut and destroy education in Florida all these years are also teaching at those same universities, and they aren't doing it for free. Guess who's paying for that? Can you say "Ka-Ching?"
But at least the governor didn't turn you away completely empty handed. Here's a nice blue Sharpie with Rick Scott's name on it.
(Photo: Last year's Sharpies, and last year's budget signing, flgov.com.)