You're Going To Need A Bigger Bottle
Marco Rubio has been pretending to run for President ever since he ran for his Senate seat back in 2010. Today he officially enters the race, and his campaign and the media will work hard to sell him as a "fresh face" (again, he's been a fresh face for about five years now, but sure), a moderate (depends on what your definition of a moderate is), while they tell you he's the GOP's version of Obama (never mind that Rubio and the GOP also claim Obama is the worst President ever....), and that he's smart (as compared to....?) and qualified to talk on the issues.
Well, he's qualified to talk, but that's just about where it ends. After all, there are parrots who are qualified to talk, but that doesn't make them qualified to be President.
Sure, Marco Rubio loves to talk. In fact, it's just about all he does. He's been doing little else other than making speeches for years while trying to sound knowledgable. He's traveled the globe pretending to be a foreign policy expert, while just repeating what the neocons have told him to say. In fact, he's announcing his entry into the race by calling for a "New American Century." If that sounds familiar, it should. Recall the Project For The New American Century of neo-conservative fame, headed by the man famous for being wrong about everything and for bringing us Sarah Palin, Bill Kristol. It was the think tank for all the Bush war neo-cons. (You can refresh your memory on it here.)
But he's a qualified, fresh face? No. He's never had an original thought. He makes speeches. He writes (wink, wink) books. He likes sound bytes and catchy slogans. But most of all, he shills for donations. He's a big fan of helping the GOP manufacture a crisis, followed by scary emails asking for donations to fight said manufactured crisis. It's what he does.
What he doesn't do is spend much time doing his job in Washington. He can be found on the list of Senators who have missed the most votes, many on issues he claims to be "uniquely qualified to talk about." He loves to talk a good game on foreign policy and terrorism, but just try to get him to attend a briefing on the same, and you'll find him absent due to fundraising for his presidential run.
And yes, as with all the Republican Party, he criticizes President Obama. According to "expert" Rubio, there is nothing the President has done that is good. Zero. Zilch. If criticism was a qualification to run the country then Rubio would indeed fit the bill.
I've been going through the Beach Peanuts archives and there are some really big Rubio blunders that even I had forgotten about, so I decided to compile some of his greatest hits here as a reminder on just how unqualified Rubio is. For someone who's been planning his Presidential run for years, Rubio has hit "fail" even before his rollout. He's not waiting until the days after like Ted Cruz and Rand Paul. No sir, Rubio tops them both.
Here now is a look at some of the many, MANY reasons Marco Rubio isn't qualified, nor remotely ready for prime time, some of the things you might not know about his truly extreme views, what he actually stands for, and what he's against.
Smart? Knowledgable? Qualified to be President? You be the judge: